May 02

Radical Agenda EP136 – Reservation

Once upon a time, a group of anti-capitalist fanatics sat down and tried to figure out how best to wage their war against reality. Realizing the odds were against them, they were open to a variety of strategies. One suggested they riot in the streets. Another said they should seek political office. Still others insisted lying incessantly on television was the best approach. In the end, they decided to attack on all fronts.

Radical Agenda EP136 - Reservation

Radical Agenda EP136 – Reservation

It wasn’t going to be easy. Reality is omnipresent and thus no easy foe to best. Dividing one’s forces against it seemed foolhardy to many in attendance, but the anticapitalists developed a strategy to make it work. They would breed like rabbits, because that’s exactly what they are. This was expensive of course, but once they had managed to obtain political office, they could harness the productive efforts of the wolves to subsidize their breeding through the tax code.

For a time, the plan worked spectacularly. As the anticapitalist rodents increased in number, they obtained ever more political power. They obtained a near total stranglehold on the media. With those steps of the plan secured, they were able to portray their bloody and brutal riots as peaceful social movements.

But then, something unexpected happened. Suddenly their media smears began to work against them. Having convinced the world that near every word in the English language was “racist” they began hurling the accusations at one another. Even Hillary Clinton, the hive queen of the rabbit people was no longer safe from this linguistic debasement. For merely saying “off the reservation” she was accused of being racist against native Americans.

Meanwhile, riots broke out on “May Day” as the anticapitalists threw rocks and molotov cocktails at police, broke windows, and destroyed property. An Iraqi cleric attempted to overthrow America’s puppet government. Detroit public school teachers walked off the job. An 11 year old shot a burglar, and election fraud became mainstream news.

The plan began to unravel so rapidly, that an openly racist billionaire began to beat the hive queen of the rabbit people in presidential polling, even after being endorsed by the Imperial Wizard of the KKK.

Suddenly, their accusations of racism meant nothing. The wolves got wise to the plot against them. Militias which came to be known as “Deportation Forces” and “Right Wing Death Squads” began to rise up. Before long, the rabbit people began to tremble at the sight of rope, or the sound of rotary aircraft. But it was too late. The rabbit people had become so sure they had outsmarted the wolves that they had rendered themselves defenseless against them. Brittle bones snapped between fangs as rodent blood dripped from whiskers, and with each night that passed they were reminded that their day was coming as they heard the wolves howling at the moon “Alright, on with it!”

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Join us, this and every Monday, as well as Wednesdays and Fridays from 5-7pm Eastern for another exciting episode of the Radical Agenda. It’s a show about common sense extremism where we talk about radical, crazy, off the wall things like going off the reservation.

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